Lee D. Lies & Rocco Makes Up Her Own Countdowns
Posted December 18, 2010on:
**UPDATE** Word on the street is Lee made a mistake, because he is human. People are saying that he saw his name at the #4 spot… but he was just #4 on the list of potential candidates. Honest mistake. He got excited and jumped to conclusions…. hmmmm. Just like I did. I’m sorry I called you a liar.
Dearest Lee Bear (& Friends),
How are you?? How’s all the fibbing going for ya??
Lee bear…. you straight up lied. Remember this little tweet/text:
#4 on vh1?! Thanks for the love guys, were in it together.
Of course you do because you consciously wrote it thinking “Wow… I’m such a dude right now. Look at me straight up speaking some falsehoods”. I’m assured those were your exact words.
Ummmm. I don’t know what countdown you were watching, but this didn’t happen. Was this the countdown in your head?? If so, that’s even worse… make yourself #1. You don’t even know how to make up a countdowns the right way. Rule #1: Always make yourself number 1. That’s how all the countdowns in my head go; I’m the one to beat baby!
And WE’RE not in this together…. because you lied. I spent 35 minutes finding fun pictures, to do math with, and googling the #4 to give you fun facts. And only to find out it was a lie. What?!
I don’t even know what to say. I’m stunned into silence from your deception. (oh, that was so dramatic) There wasn’t even a countdown this weekend (except the awesome end of the year countdown. I live for those… that’s why I love the holiday season.)
Oh, I just thought of an end of the year countdown you could be on… 2010′s Worst Liars! You’d be #2, because I think Tiger Woods was a little bit more of a liar than you. Unless, there is something you’d like to share now??
As stated before… if this turned out to be a lie… you have to give me 35 minutes of my life back. But, since I know your busy and that’s hard to do I only have 2 requests for you to make it up to me (and the rest of us)
1) Interview spring 2011 is totes mcgotes on. Have your people, tweet my people.
2) And I can now posts pictures that people have sent me (and some I found on my own… my research skills from college are sick nasty) annnnnnnd you can’t be mad about it.
I’ll make it fun… it’ll be a little made up countdown since you love them SOOOOO much!
Here we go! *spoiler alert* You’re #1 at everything… because that’s how fantasy countdowns go.
This is a throw back: 1986′s #1 Best Cowboy Baby
2010′s #1 Human Pretending To Be A Velociraptor
2010′s #1 Attempt At A Wink
2010′s #1 Best White Boy Dancer
2010′s #1 Best Self Portrait
2010′s #1 Bear Supporting Pandas (That shirt is great… I really had to make up a countdown for this)
2010′s #1 Best Use Of A Plaid Sports Jacket And A Fun, Festive Holiday Scarf
2010′s #1 Use Of The Color Red In A Usually Mundane Wardrobe
2010′s #1 Couple
And last but not least 2010′#1 BEST HAIR!!!
Get it now Lee D.?? That’s how you make up faux countdowns.
Let this sink in and think about it before you make another false statement via Twitter.
Oh and Happy Holidays… have fun in Chicago. If you happen to see Oprah tell her I said “Hey” and give her that idea of the three-way interview. Don’t forget… you owe me.