My Favorite Mullet Is Definitely On Drugs & Andrew Garcia Can’t Spell
Posted January 23, 2011on:
I go away for 12 hours to celebrate the fact that a child has been alive for 1 year (BTW I got their late and missed the first time the kid ate cake… AKA the best part of a 1st birthday party. I’m just gonna have to have a kid, so I can see that happen) and I come back to pure chaos.
Alex Lambert, mullet kid, needs to stop doing drugs and/or cancel his twitter account. This is like a scripted MTV reality series up in this joint.
“19 entertainment put me on a retainer?? I just got back on the internet from like a week ago and I’m reading that everywhere! When Do I get this retainer? I don’t know where anyone got that from??? These guys have been telling the media they been payin me! Makin me look like im lyin! It’s a shame dude! They got the wrong Lambert I guess? That’s all I can think of??”
So, that’s what Alex Lambert was going on and on about as he sat on Twitter whilst twirling his mullet. I assume that’s what he does… I don’t have proof of this, but it seems pretty logical.
Apparently, he’s still homeless and has no money. Glad he could hop in Starbucks long enough to tweet this.
But, my favorite part is when the coolest dude on the planet, Andrew Garcia, got into this mess:
bro immma come to Hollywood next Monday! Imma hot you up and let you know that ou don’t need no fuckin label! Trust our fans ate our family! I got your back and so do they! Live you bro!
First off… I had to read this a few times to decode this. He needs to revisit Mavis Beacon and work on his home row keys (ahhh ps… ESS just came on my iPod.. and my day got better).
“Imma hot you up” : I don’t what that means, but it sounds painful.
“trust our fans ate our family” : Don’t trust your fans if they ATE your family. That’s awful. I would never do that!
“live you bro” : That “i” and “o” key messes everyone up. Spell check my friends, spell check. Whoever invented the keyboard should have thought of drunk typing. Live/love get mixed up too much.
This is some serious business happening. Andrew G. now has to go to Hollywood, to get Mullet, in order to save his fans from eating his family, because that already happened to him. It’s a mess.
They should probably make music together. That would actually be a brilliant idea.
I just want it to be known that it was my idea and the three of us (Andrew G., mullet and me) go splitsies on the profit. 45-45-10. I don’t even need that much.
(just pretend Lee D. isn’t in that picture because he’s the only one who isn’t homeless and/or on drugs and/or has had his family eaten.)
Some people shouldn’t have Twitter.