E! News… I Laugh In Your Face With Your Superhero Competitions
Posted on: September 1, 2011
This is honestly a headline over that so-called entertainment news source, E! News:
Who is the blogger over there??? How is that even a fair competition?? And if any of you are even choosing Henry Cavill over my Garfield Boo!, we currently are in the biggest fight you have ever been in.
Andy is tasteful and I can’t see the outline of his package (ps Mamadukes is so proud when posts like this sprinkle out of my fast typing fingers). True, I can see the outline of his ass… but I would see that in his hipster pants anyway.
Plus, Andrew Garfield is extremely limber….
….and Henry Cavill punches like a girl.
That punch wouldn’t hurt a bad guy. The only tactic he could possibly use is the massive distraction that is his bulge.
See my point?? E! News can just take this article down and send their apology in the form of The Amazing Spiderman premiere tickets to me within the next week.
*edit* I did a little more research (read: continued to Google Andrew Garfield because it’s an addiction!) and it turns out Spiderman sports a bulge too. Whoops!
I’m okay with that. It’s subtle. Subdued. And Spiderman shoots white stuff out of his wrists. And also… never mind.
(This post will definitely land me a job.)
-Rocco
PS Look at this great photo I found during my “research”
Ignore the guy on the left and focus on the suspenders, hair, and Robert Pattinson’s jawline. You’re welcome.
8 Responses to "E! News… I Laugh In Your Face With Your Superhero Competitions"
September 1, 2011 at 5:26 PM
Holy Moly! Tons of bulges, crazy poses, and an ASS! What a post!
Oh, and for the record, of course, Andrew WINS! 
September 2, 2011 at 10:19 AM
Thank Oprah I use an under-water keybooard designed for divers becuase I spill coffee or tea a lot when I work, or I’d have ruined a conventional one when I saw this post. Rocco you’re such a riot! I wasn’t particularly impressed by A.G.’s “full moon” but the “limber” pose got me. And, as you can imagine, a mouthful of black coffee escaped me and landed on the waterproof keypad. Praise the O! Or otherwise, ouch! I can’t help wondering what the person with longish hair is doing to Andrew in such a dramatic fashion. Kudos to the one who caught this compromising moment of the British Spider-Man taking a tight break on location. Mmmm
June 22, 2012 at 12:37 PM
that guy on the left happen to be hot hot hott as well man. he’s Rob’s bestie tom sturridge. this pic may not his best 
July 9, 2012 at 3:09 AM
This is honestly a headline over that so-called entertainment news source, E! News:
http://www.hamiltonjunkremoval.info/
September 1, 2011 at 1:28 PM
holy s**t rocco! i just spit my tea out lol!!!!!!!!! i can’t even begin to comment on the “limber” picture of spiderman let alone your comment about shooting “white stuff” (thank oprah it’s coming out of his wrists) LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!
September 1, 2011 at 1:52 PM
hahaha thank you for laughing at this. this is my fav post of the day. lol