I really thought it was going to be an STD. I’m shocked it’s not an STD. Did I tell you that it’s NOT and STD?

I know. I’m shocked it’s not an STD too.

I’m also shocked that it’s not a disease were one feels the need to dress like Johnny Depp until his dying day.

I seriously don’t know what to make fun of first with that outfit above, so I’m just gonna go back to talking about the NOT STD disease John Mayer has.

Hi everyone,
After several months of going week to week monitoring and hoping to correct the condition, I am forced to cancel my upcoming singing engagements due to something next to my vocal cords called a granuloma.
I’m bummed to have to bow out of both the iheartradio Music Festival in Las Vegas and an appearance with Tony Bennett in Los Angeles. I know there were people depending on me to be there and I’m sorry that I can’t be on those stages.
‘Born and Raised’ is complete as far as music recording, song selection, and in some cases mixing, but because of this condition I couldn’t finish singing on several of the tracks. This means the record will be released next year instead of this fall or winter.
This is a temporary setback, though I’m not sure how long or short a period of time it will be. I’ve got the best doctors in the country looking after me and I will be singing and touring again as soon as I get the all clear. Until then I’ll be spending time writing and composing more music and kicking an empty soup can around the West Village.
I’m looking forward to seeing you again soon. Until then take good care.
John

Apparently, Granuloma is some sort of throat issue so now John Mayer can’t sing until it heals. Call me a bitch, but I kinda hope the doctors tell him he can’t talk for like 6-9 months. That will be kinda peaceful for the rest of us.

I’m still in shock this isn’t an untreatable STD.

-Rocco