This is exactly why you don’t lick koalas and/or kiss their cute little, fuzzy heads… they are apparently running rampant with STD’s.

Look at that koala’s face! It totally has his “I’m peeing on these boys and passing along chlamydia right now” face on.

Up to 80 per cent of the koalas in Australia are infected with the STD — and 18-year-olds Liam and Harry have been warned they could be carrying it after cuddling three-year-old marsupial Kat.

Liam, the nerdy one (not pictured because I don’t have a crush on him… let’s be real) is upset by this whole ordeal. “I’m genuinely scared. This is worrying. I’d have never picked the thing up if I’d known.” The only direction these guys need to go now is to a Plan Parenthood for some testing. (BOOM!… that was funny!)

Gross. Does Walgreens have an at home STD test kit? I can’t run the risk of catching an STD from a One Direction dude if just by chance the one with the fun hair and/or the minority of the group (again I’m pretending not to know their names so I can keep my street cred) sleepover… though imagine the blog post that could be.

-Rocco