Posts Tagged ‘Breaking Dawn Part II’
Most of you posted pictures of your mom’s big ass hair from 1984 on Twitter, some of us posted pictures of our moms when they were foxes and we were naive toddlers and didn’t brush our hair.
But there was that select group who posted Twilight-themed Mother’s Day posts because the younger generation in American is out of their goddamn minds.
I usually have pretty optimistic views of our future— until the knowledge that someone made the photograph below.
WHAT THE F**K IS THAT?!?
I hope whoever made this spent time with their own mother yesterday and didn’t watch Breaking Dawn Part II and wish that their mother was a vampire. But– you and I both know the latter happened.
-Rocco
Mit Romney was seen pumping gas recently and I’m just going to say it— he looks like shit.
I mean, besides the fact that he looks like he just lost an election that he swore he was going to win, Mitt looks like he seriously bloated on carbonated beverages (*gasp* like soda!) and like he just committed some murders.
Oh and as a bonus Mitt took his wife Ann to go see Breaking Dawn Part II which is fun because we all know the Mormon undertones in that one.
That picture is just making a whole lost more sense now.
-Rocco
He calls Edward an “ax murderer” and the Mormon author a freak.
He should win an award just for being the sexiest douche on camera.
That is really hilarious and the best part is at the 2:10 mark “What Makes You Beautiful” starts playing for some reason.
-Rocco
“There is way too much alcohol in my blood to commit to ‘Breaking Dawn’ right now”- Rocco
Those are words that came out of my mouth on Friday night when some guy asked me why I wasn’t at the movies watching Kristen Stewart bite her lip, and it was the truth.
I never thought I’d say this but I just couldn’t care less about this movie. I get that as a twenty something who wants to stare at Robert Pattinson’s bone structure for 2 hours should make me a midnight showing girl, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it this time around.
I honestly think it’s because there were like 19 premieres and all of that felt like a 2 hour movie.
Why am I doing this again?- Robert Pattinson
Robert Pattinson is still over this.
Oh and this stuffed werewolf is a better actor than Kristen Stewart.
-Rocco
We Get It— Breaking Dawn Part II Is Coming Out. Enough With The Premieres
Posted on: November 16, 2012
At least Kristen Stewart covered her ass cheeks.
No ass cheeks– but I can almost see her vagina.
Anyway, Breaking Dawn Part MY GOD WHEN IS THIS GOING TO END!! premiered in Madrid, so Robert Pattinson put on his sexiest suit and tried to keep his dignity.
Robert Pattinson hates his life. He hates it so much.
-Rocco
So, Kristen Stewart Is Really Into This “Ass Cheek” Trend That Only She Is Participating In
Posted on: November 15, 2012
Soooooooo Kristen didn’t get that new stylist that I suggested. If only she had twitter— I would be able to harasses her about this issue.
For some reason, Breaking Dawn Part II is having ANOTHER premiere (because they just won’t let this end!!) and Kristen Stewart has worn another hideous outfit to promote this movie.
Her ass cheeks have done more acting during these premieres than Kristen has done on all 5 films.
But who cares what Kristen Stewart is doing— how does Robert Pattinson feel about the end of the Twilight shit-chise (like a franchise that everyone is tired of)?
-Rocco
Hey Kristen Stewart Showing Your Ass Cheeks Isn’t Going To Make You A Better Actress
Posted on: November 14, 2012
Hey Rup— I mean, Robert! Look at my ass!
I was so distracted by Robert Pattinson’s sexy green emerald suit that I didn’t notice Kristen Stewart had a see through dress on and we all got to check out the outline of her ass and her hoo-had in some beige granny panties.
Let’s all remind ourselves that she HATES attention and nothing says “guys— don’t look at me!! Stop it guys!” like a see-through dress.
BUTT (hah– get it?) enough of her, let’s check our Robert Pattinson in his Christmas suit.
Should I show my underwear too?
Ehhh When will this all be over?
-Rocco
OH CRAP! I Never Watched The Red Carpet Live Stream Of ‘Breaking Dawn Part II’!! WHAT HAPPENED?!?!
Posted on: November 13, 2012
Did Kristen Stewart cry, smile, BOTH?!?!? Was Robert Pattinson glowing or depressed because he had to pretend to love the trampire?
Okay— so Rob is not glowing and Kristen Stewart looks like she’s on a tranquilizer so all is well in Twilight world!
Let’s just look at pictures of Robert Pattinson because he looks like a hot little leprechaun in his green suit.
-Rocco
That headline really made no sense, but those two fellas are sitting on Ellen DeGeneres’ couch so why not?
Taylor Lautner and Robert Pattinson are making the media rounds to promote the end of the franchise that the world is SO OVER, so of course Robert Pattinson is just super charming and hot the entire time.
If I could sit and watch him talk about his dog, Bear, all day long I would.
And if I could put my self in a 5 day kill shelter in hopes R Pattz would come and scoop me up and away in a private jet I’d do it in a heartbeat.
I’d ALSO let Taylor Lautner talk about his wax figure and Rob continue to talk about his zipper issues.
(side note: I believe the full interview aired at some point this week, so check your DVR people)
-Rocco
- In: Tidbits
- 2 Comments
Oh remember a few months ago when Kristen Stewart was a giant whore and cheated on Robert Pattinson in pure day light because she’s a whore? And remember a few weeks ago when some of us started to feel a little bad for her because she’s human and she was just sad about her giant whore-y mistake?
Yeah well that’s all shit now because she’s back to banging Robert Pattinson behind close doors and back to being a bitch.
While on promo for Breaking Dawn Part II ( WHEN WILL THIS FRANCHISE END?!?!?) Kristen Stewart was asked by the soldiers over at the Today Show about her and Robert Pattinson’s status. And of course Kristen rolls her eyes and throws shade at the reporter as if she didn’t know the questions was going to come up during these promos.
Extra fun: Kristen Stewart looks like she huffed paint with Diane Sawyer on the streets of NYC.
“Funny you mention that. I’m going to just let people watch whatever little movie they think our lives are. Keep ‘em guessing, I always say.”
Umm moron– you’re the one who released a public apology and then went on to wear every article of clothing you kept from Robert Pattinson in public for the next few months so don’t get pissed when someone asks you about your relationship like you’re above that shit.
She’s such a moron.
But side note— really can’t wait to see which director she bangs next because that whole fall out was hilarious and great material.
-Rocco
