Posts Tagged ‘Canada’
I will never EVER get over the fact that Drake was (and always will be) Jimmy from Degrassi. WHEELCHAIR JIMMY!
Wheelchair Jimmy is getting back to his roots (or his wheels? Hah– get it!?) and kicking it with that other kid that was in Degrassi this is probably still living up in Canada and seething that his career didn’t have that good ‘ol Canadian Luck like Wheelchair Jimmy—- and Justin Bieber—- and Carley Rae Jepsen—– and we can even throw in Joshua Jackson and Cory Monteith.
Basically everyone from Degrassi sucks besides Wheelchair Jimmy, but he had to sit down for 14 hours a day while filming, so it’s only fair.
(Side note: I obviously gave up on Degrassi too soon, because Wheelchair Jimmy became Crutch Jimmy.
That other dude got kind of hot.
But more importantly this happened:
OMG GAY MARCO! Degrassi taught me so much!
Posted January 7, 2013on:
One time I asked my father what “chronic” was because I’m not a gangster. And apparently, Big D is really into Dr. Dre and informed me that chronic is “high quality weed”. (so many drug references on The Revolution today— thanks a lot Justin Bieber).
Anyway, two white girls (probably from Canada or North Dakota) have convinced their rich parents to let them start a group called Teenchronic, act like fools, embarrass themselves, and release a song called “Skip Rope”. I watched this in its entirety and it’s so bad it’s not even a little bit entertaining. At least Rebecca Black was hilarious.
The only good thing about this “music video” is the fact that it reminded me of the giant Pixy Stix. Those shits were so good and now I understand this Teenchronic thing. When I was 12 and hopped up on a pound of flavored sugar, I thought I was a rapper too.
I get ‘chu Teenchronic.
Listen people– Justin Bieber can’t vote in the presidential election. Yes, he is 18. But no, he’s not a citizen of the United States.
I know we all wish we could take credit for Justin Bieber and call him an American, but we can’t. No one is more upset over this than me.
If these kids are such massive Justin Bieber fans you think they would know what his passport says.
Pshhh kids these days!
She doesn’t know the lyrics to the National Anthem, so the only real option in this national disaster is she’s an illegal immigrant. She’s too pale and her accent doesn’t match Mexicans… so it has to be Canada, eh??
Okay… so she didn’t mess up the lyrics so much as hiccup or burp during the middle of the song. If she burped, she can be an American again, because that’s totally something a Southerner would do.
Those Canadians get Justin Bieber and a bunch of Mumford & Sons shows. Lucky.
Taylor Swift recently got back the road for her Speak Now tour after her bout of sickness, and of course she does the exact medley that I sing on a daily basis to express all my feelings.
“Baby”?!?!?!? Taylor… why are you so perfect?? I beg all my favorite musicians to cover “Baby” and she just does it because she wants to be my best friend too! She gets it.
She is a gem and a half.
Now, I know you are all saying “why is there a box at the end of that statement??” I said the same thing because on my phone it was a question mark and that’s why at 6:19AM I wrote this post in my head. So just trust me that it came through as a question mark and that Twitter doesn’t know what it’s talking about. Have I ever lied about a Lee D fact just to benefit The Revolution and make a joke?? Exactly.
= ? <—– think of it like a math problem.
Anyway, Lee D is questioning whether this is a Happy 4th of July.
And I can only assume it’s because he’s not really from America and I will wait patiently for Donald Trump to demand a long form birth certificate. If not that little American Idol title will be revoked.
He’s probably Canadian and that’s why he has to hide his secret BFF-ness with J Biebs. If he’s seen kicking it with the king of maple syrup… the jig is up. Lee D is out of the Canadian closet.
So I say Happy Birthday America!!, 100% Happy 4th of July to The Revolution readers and about 76% Happy 4th of July to Lee D, because I haven’t seen his birth certificate yet.
Don’t look at this firework GIF Lee D… it’s not for you. Or for J Biebs. (I know you two are hanging out today, pretending to be American)
It’s no secret that I’m an actual J Biebs fan. Like, I own his albums. I haven’t even bought David Cook’s album yet because I really want to buy a deluxe version of Justin Bieber’s.
That’s not true…. or is it??
Anyway, I better start saving for a whole new record of J Biebs’ perfect pop tunes because that little angel muffin is heading into the studio and his music is pretty much the manifestation of Jesus. If Jesus was from Canada and had maple syrup running through his royal blood.
“I want to work a lot with myself. And [I want to] write a lot myself. I will be working with a lot of other producers and stuff like that, but I’m just writing a lot, writing on tour. [I'm] writing about how I feel and producing. I’ve been producing on my laptop and on my computer. I’ve been really into it and, hopefully, this next album will be huge. I’ve done a lot on my acoustic guitar, so it’s gonna have that vibe. I’m not gonna really limit myself. I think music is music, and genre — I mean, I know there’s country music, there’s rock music, but my music is different. My voice is not meant for any style. I just want to make music.”
No it’s not J Biebs. Your voice is meant to give other angels (the loser angels that can’t sing and dance) a pair of wings. (and to create silly bands)
Run?? Fight back?? Have sex on the street??
Well, these two in heat freaks decided to have a full on make out sesh during some riot in some city that I do not remember the name of. (I think Vancouver??)
That is quite a beautiful image. Heart warming.
Before we get into the performance, I want to relay the conversation I had with the people who created me and raised me:
Big D: ‘Yello sweethaaart. Whatta ya want?
Rocco: DAD!! I love Casey. I want him to be my boyfriend.
Big D: You like the ugliest guys… you have the worst taste!
Rocco: WHAT?? He’s so adorable. He’s a little snuggle bear.
Big D: He looks like a pumpkin. Ima put you on the phone with your motha.
Rocco: Dad doesn’t approve of Casey.
Mamadukes: Oh I don’t like him… I was in the shower. What did he sing?
Rocco: “Your Song”.
Mamadukes: What’s my song?? What song do I like??
Rocco: HAHHAH NO! The song is called “Your Song”.
And then like 20 minutes later….
Mamadukes: I know why you like Casey. He looks like your dentist.
Rocco: Did you just say I’m sexually attracted to my dentist??
Mamadukes: HAHHAHA. Yes.
Rocco: You’re a sick woman.
That all happened.
Anyway… Casey Abrams sang “Your Song” and I’m jealous of anyone who gets to see him on a daily basis. Is it too late to be an intern on Idol??
Look at him!! He trimmed his little beard, cut his jew fro, and sang a song from Moulin Rouge! I’m pretty sure he was flirting with me. And guess what?? It worked!
If he gets voted off tonight… call up Mrs. Bieber. I’m moving to Canada and need a couch to sleep on.