Posts Tagged ‘hats’
- In: Tidbits
- 11 Comments
Okay… clearly royal wedding things will be sprinkled throughout The Revolution today as I find silly things. I’ll try not to be obnoxious about it… but these dumb ass hats need to be made fun of.
Who looks in the mirror and says, “yeah?? I look awesome!”
I’m sorry. I know it’s not right to insult royals (especially if you are currently plotting to embed yourself into the royal family. I’m working on my British right now) but these hats look ugly. That one on the left, may be alive.
Oh, and David Beckham looks ridiculous as well.
I’ll bet you 100 US dollars that Victoria Beckham didn’t smile once! And I’m pretty sure girl isn’t actually pregnant. I had a bowl of fruit this morning and my stomach is protruding more than her 3+ month belly. Just saying.
-Rocco
Clearly, I’m cleaning out my draft box today.
No your eyes are not lying to you.
That is a man (who I thought was totally going to be from Eastern Europe but his name is Shawn… so he’s probably from Milwaukee or something) who has a tiny, feathery, glittery, Carrie Bradshaw hat on his head.
Now, you are probably asking, “How is that fabulous hat staying fastened to his closely shaved head??”
SUPER GLUE!
(Okay… so I wrote everything above before watching the video, I guess. He’s not from Milwaukee… he’s a Brit.)
1) I’m praying to Oprah that this man has actually had this on his head since October, and this isn’t just an old video. Don’t tell me otherwise.
2) How his friend is not pissing his pants from laughing so hard is beyond me. I’d be twitpic-ing like a maniac.
3) Why would anyone NOT want to wear that hat for the rest of their life is boggling my mind.
4) The doctor had to draw out his plan of action.
They should probably call Dr. House.
5) This is the worst doctor in the universe of doctors. He didn’t even get all of the hat off. I’d sue.
-Rocco
PS I have no idea how to tag this.
- In: Lee DeWyze
- 8 Comments
Lee D. tweeted something at some point yesterday and though it seems like a simple message… I’m pretty sure there is A LOT of meaning behind his 140 characters. I’m like 87% sure this is what he actually meant.
First off… I get so annoyed when he spells everything correctly. That’s such an easy target and I wish he wouldn’t spell check.
“Looking forward to the show with Lincoln”….
1) His name is Linc the Sink… get it right Lee bear. I call people by nothing else then the name Oprah would want them to have.
2) He’s clearly looking forward to the show with Linc the Sink because the hat tradsies is happening tonight!! He’s just playing coy.
This is me being coy in the shadows
I feel it in my bones!
How can he deny the 984398 tweets about it, that awesome picture Tatis R made, and my discussion of it for over a month now. I have never been so motivated about anything in my life.
3) “just got done jamming”….. this means a few things. We know he won’t mess up because he practiced. And that’s good because I can’t like him if he sucks, it goes against my high standards and morals. And I’m also going to go out on a limb and say he’s going to play “The Week The Planet Didn’t Move On A Tuesday”.
I know you’re saying “Rocco… you’re crazy girl!!”… I just have a gut feeling about this.
(He better play “Earth Stood Still”… I will fake not talk to him for a whole day if he doesn’t)
4) “It’s gonna be fun”…. this eludes to all that I said above and to the fact that he’ll probably wear a purple shirt with some sort of animal on it. I’m hoping for a rattle snake… or maybe a bear. That’d be pretty cool. A purple bear.
If he owns a fun shirt like this... he owns a purple one with a rattle snake or a bear on it. It's just commonsense people.
Okay, the rest is pretty obvious what he was trying to say… but the 1st part was totally cryptique and thank Oprah I’m here to decode for you guys.
I whipped out my decoder ring and everything, so I’m confident this is what he was trying to get across.
How did I do Lee bear??
Ummm let me see???
Come on Lee bear… it’s kind of obvious what you’re trying to say.
*thumbs up* YOU'RE RIGHT!!
YAYAYYA! Oh man… I can’t wait to see video and pictures of all this tonight.
This is make or break. I will shut this operation down for 3 hours (instead of 2) and then re-open it again, if it doesn’t happen tonight.
It’s so stressful… just do it.
How about if I just pose like this??
I don’t wanna see any of this male model shit unless that hat is on your head Lee bear.
I’m serious.
(These business cards should be at your houses by 6PM. I have my people on it.)
-Rocco
Lee D. : A Picture Story
Posted on: January 27, 2011
- In: Lee DeWyze
- 9 Comments
Linc The Sink: Dude… my head is so warm. You should have worn this hat. I’m sternly looking at the back of your head and you are ignoring me. Just how you ignore Rocco… I know how she feels.
Lee D: Do you think I can quickly reach under my hat and grab a snack?? I feel like I forgot something today?? Like an article of clothing I should be wearing?? Weird.
Don Draper: I’m so happy to be on TV!!
-Rocco
PS Thank you Magical_Lee for this photo!!!
- In: Tidbits
- 2 Comments
I can’t think of a funny title… because it’s so scary. Instead of that physically impossible image of the birds carrying that dumb whale.
Can't actually happen in real life
This should be the image:
This CAN actually happen
Ever see Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds??? Well it looks like that, except real life!!
So, I propose this to you Twitter people to use this image instead. There isn’t even a need for a clever title like “fail whale” because the image is so frightening.
You’re welcome. And no payment is needed. I provide this to you out of the kindness of my heart and now I have done my good deed for the day. And look at that it’s on 11:11. MAKE A WISH!
*makes wish*…. Lee D. is gonna be so shocked at to why he wakes up with the intense desire to wear the HAT OF ALL FREAKIN’ HATS on Sunday.
why do I have the intense desire to wear the hat of all freakin' hats all of a sudden?? This is so weird! I can't stop laughing about it.
-Rocco
The Original Linc The Sink
Posted on: January 13, 2011
- In: Tidbits
- 5 Comments
This post serves no purpose except to introduce the original Linc The Sink to people who have no idea where I got that name, or why I insist on calling anyone by the name of Lincoln, that stupid nick name. Seriously. If I went back in time with Marty McFly and Doc Brown, and met Abraham Lincoln, I’d probably say, “Hey Linc The Sink… what should we do first?? Abolish slavery or go hunt some vampires??” Honestly. That’s what would be said.
The reason this all came up is there’s a show Spartacus: Blood & Sand ,that sounds really fun and children friendly, that needs a new actor. And the actor that’s up for the spot is Dominic Purcell. That’s the original Linc The Sink from Prison Break!
Hello. I'm the original Linc the Sink
So yeah…. that’s all I wanted to say.
And I guess, I subconsciously wanted to repost this as well.
WTF?! bear and Linc The Sink part deux (and THE HAT OF ALL FREAKIN' HATS)
-Rocco
- In: Kris Allen | Lee DeWyze | Music
- 10 Comments
My favorite Kris that spells his name with a “K” totally hearts Britney Spears too! (I have quite the recurring theme going today… Jersey Shore/Britney /American Idol (because I always talk about Idol one way or another).
Once again… I forgot who sent this to me, I think Cindy??? If I’m wrong, sorry.. if not, YOU GO GIRL! ItsMyT1me sent it to me! She still gets a YOU GO GIRL!!
“…Baby One More Time” may be one of my fav Britney Spears songs (well, I also like “Toxic” and “Slave 4 U”, so if he could get on doing one of those, that’d be great. Oh man… now I’m demanding things from Kris with a K… I need help) I mean the lyrics are great: “oh baby baby, how was I supposed to know that something wasn’t right here. Oh baby baby, I shouldn’t have let you goo-oooo”. Who hasn’t said those words in their daily life??? I definitely have… because I say it at least once a relationship.
Baby can't you see?? I'm calling.... a girl like you, should wear a warning. It's dangerous, I'm falling....
Kris with A K says it better though because he says those words with a guitar and just gets more and more talented every time I see him. Here is an acoustic version… (kind of like the one Matt Cardle did… but Kris with a K did it first and doesn’t sound like a woman… so he wins???)
And then…. Kris with a K decided to get his whole band and the Miami Dolphins involved in this fiasco.
That sunshine burning his retinas is just Oprah shining down her light of approval on the wonderful-ness that is happening on stage.
My first thought was to request something like this of Lee D.(because let’s be honest… at this point its a huge scavenger hunt that I created… it’s turned into a mess and I’m just gonna keep going with it until I see some results. I don’t quit. I’m very stubborn.) but a Britney Spears song might be taking it a little too far. He might cut me off. I’m definitely going to leave all these B. Spears requests for Kris with a K… he seems more down with it than Lee bear. (Lee bear could do any Backstreet Boys song he likes though… I’ll let him run with that idea)
Tell me why.. ain't nothing but a mistake. Tell me why... I never wanna hear you say... I want it that way.
(you know, for some reason, this may be the least bizarre request I ask from him. For some reason this doesn’t seem as insane has the HAT OF ALL FREAKIN’ HATS or “California Love”… but maybe it’s just the BSB positivity vibes that is coursing through my veins because I typed out some lyrics. It’s like my confidence and ‘believe in anything’ juice.)
I really have nowhere to go with this except I like it a lot. I came up with some really good ideas for both Lee bear and Kris with a K.
-Rocco
Rocco Needs Lee D. To Perform Some Emotions…. And Record Them. Is That Weird?
Posted on: January 5, 2011
- In: Lee DeWyze
- 7 Comments
Ok so watch that video and go into a giggle fit.
Okay you laughed??? Is everyone cracking up and missing Dawson’s Creek?? Lee bear are you rolling on the floor laughing and now have the urge to fulfill my every need? (On a side note: Did you watch Dawson’s Creek? I love that show. It pretty much shaped my views on high school, love, and life in general.)
Great! I’m glad you feel the same way I do. Because I kinda need you to perform like you’ve never performed before. Don’t freak out.. just hear me out.
This girl does not stop! She's driving me insane!
You should seriously think about performing all these emotions for me ,so I can have them at my disposal. Do you know how much fun I could have with them?? You will be my hero. And all by yourself, by performing this generous gesture, you will catapult this blog into infamy. Don’t you want that on your legacy?? I will never EVER make fun of your hair, hats or outfits again. Okay… that’s a lie, I’m going to do that anyway… but just think how much funnier it will be with all these emotions that you and your wonderful head of hair will be performing.
If not, I’m just gonna have to use the Dawson Leery ones and that’s just going to break your heart (right???) and Pacey Witter’s heart. I just don’t want that to happen and I’m sure you don’t either.
I’ll even let you wear whatever hat you want in it if you do all this for me:
creepily happy
annoyed eye roll (this one is kinda essential). You may do it every time you hear the name Rocco. Which kind of hurts my feelings... but I'll cast that aside if you do this.
Awkward face. This is probably the face you're making reading this request, so just record it.
The yawn is optional. I don't really need this.
I'm sure this is how you pick up the ladies... so just do it in front of a camera.
This is gonna be my face (and the rest of your fans as well) if this doesn't happen. Do you want to be responsible for that?? I didn't think so.
This is the nostalgic look. This may not be needed... but for good measure do it anyway.
This is the slightly sad, disappointed face. This one is also essential.
This one is a little dramatic. But I could use this, because some may say I am dramatic. Shocking that my life is a hyperbole... I know.
Now these next two are so super important… if you only do them, I won’t hate you forever for not doing the rest. (See?? Not dramatic at all) I mean these two emotions are kind of like an inside joke between us.
- If you do this one… don’t direct it at me. Please.
What's better than a still "thumbs up" photo?? A moving one!
So yeah… I can’t even end this in any particular way. If you want some inspiration or just want to laugh, go to James Van Der Memes.
Just think about it before you jump and say “No!”.
And now a picture story of what will probably happen: (BTW, I’ve never seen this 1st picture… you know the drill Lee D. fans… pretend you’ve never seen it either, so I look like I have some great research skills)
Are you crazy??? I'm gonna have to say nnn.....
Hmmm this could be good for both our careers???
Yes…. yes it could Lee D.
Will you love me this many times more???
YES!
Let me think about it *scratches head*
A maybe is better than a no. You sleep on this one brotha.
And I won’t even give you a deadline for this. I mean sooner is better than later, but you can send it to me when we’re 45, and I’ll forget that I was mad at you for not doing it in a timely fashion.
But while, your thinking about it… can you get on that HAT OF ALL HATS one. Thanks!
-Rocco
HAAAAAA- LELUJAH!! HAAAAA-LELUJAH!!!
Resolutions?
This has been the best year of my entire life. Thank you all for helping me make this all possible. My new years resolution is to keep
Doing what I’m doing. Not to let what anybody says about me, my music, sales, idol this or that or anything stop me from doing what I love.
F U haters
I do what I’m doing because I love it. I am going to keep working hard at this because it’s a long road for me to accomplish my goals.
This picture has nothing to do with his wise words... I just like his profile. And he totally has treats in his hat. His head has fluffy, awesome hair and is full of wise words, and his hat is full of treats.
Happy New Year, I love you guys and thank you. Have an awesome night and be careful, but get crazy! I’ll talk to you next year
HAPPY NEW YEAR LEE BEAR!! (that's what Apple Jax said at midnight... his first words. It was astounding)
Lee bear’s words are like the gospel. Go spread his words like the good news.
- May my words be with you… and also with you
-Rocco
So, its the afternoon of New Years Eve…. I’m lounging, watching Back To The Future (naturally) for the 5th time this week (literally, the 5th time. AMC has this crazy marathon happening. It’s great.) waiting for my sister and nephew, we’ll call them Princess and Apple Jax.
Turn of the knob (during my favorite part might I add) and in comes Princess and Apple Jax… and what do you think is on that little one’s head??? THE HAT TO END ALL HATS!!
Apple Jax looked like this... but a baby.
I shit you not…there it was perched on top of his head like he came out of the womb wearing it. Instead of laughing, I stood there in shock. I thought I was on some sick version of Punk’d or Candid Camera.
It was like Lee bear and Apple Jax conspired against me.
I imagine they must have met over a beer and a football game (Apple Jax is an avid football fan) and became BFF. I already established that Lee bear becomes BFF with everybody, including babies that wear jelly sandals, and now football loving babies. This friendship turned into a collabo to taunt me. And I wouldn’t put this all past Apple Jax… he’s a sly little dude.
I immediately posted my outrage on Twitter, because I knew people who were on this quest with me would understand.
And they did…. they really did.
PaulaKO1984 @RoccosRev thats kinda cruel to tease you with the hat, haha
Sweet4DeWyze @RoccosRev What?? Really?? That’s awesome!! You should so take a pic and sent it to Lee bear and say “See everyone is doing it!” lol
MareKatslp @RoccosRev lol, he’s so ahead of the game before he’s even 1!!
Magical_Lee @RoccosRev That is so funny,I LOVE coincidences!Maybe you could take a pic of yourself in the hat to end all hats and send it to Lee bear
You all understand so much! I immediately grabbed him and attempted to take a picture with him wearing THE HAT OF ALL HATS to one, show you guys, two, have proof of the conspiracy against me, and three, to tell Lee bear if anything this just makes me want the picture more.
Now, before people freak out about me exploiting my nephew….
1) He gave me permission. He said “Auntie Rocco… if me and Lee bear can plot to taunt you… you can exploit me” . I said in return “thank you Apple Jax… and next time you talk to Lee bear you can tell him.. it’s on!”
2) I’m not above exploiting this child to get what I want. If he can hit below the belt… so can I.
3) I’m totally exposing my own identity as well. The jig is up… the secret is out! What if I was really some 45-year-old balding man?? That would be utterly shocking. And disturbing.
Take 1: Apple Jax not having any of it. He's afraid him and Lee bear would get in a fight. He <3's Lee bear... they're bros now!
Take 2: Rocco convincing Apple Jax it's cool. He doesn't have to be in the middle of this battle.
Take 3: He's a little more into it. He's getting ready to do his model face. He loves Tyra as much as he loves Lee D.
Take 4: Apple Jax the model comes out... and I begin to feel a little bad about posting these pictures.
It’s totes mcgotes on.
New Years Resolution:
1) Get my hard hitting interview/photoshoot
2) Get that freakin’ HAT OF ALL HATS picture/ California Love video
Happy New Year! I’m glad this turned into a babysitting New Years Eve.
-Rocco
