Posts Tagged ‘OWN Network’
Way to make things super awkward Oprah!
This is clearly Oprah’s new tactic for the OWN Network— bring up uncomfortable and awkward topics to people probably carrying a gun on them. Ratings gold!!
Oprah, for some reason, was interviewing 50 Cent (I don’t know why this is happening because I’m not too sure as to what he is doing with his life) but she asks him why he named his dog Oprah and his cat Gayle.
HOW DARE YOU DISRESPECT THE BIG O!!!
-Rocco
*gasp* I’ve been holding my breath since she went off air and finally I can breathe again. I’ve been waiting for this moment. She truly is the second coming.
Now that Regis is really gone from daytime television, Oprah needs to fill the void she left and that he is now leaving. Leave it to Oprah to save the day!
Oprah’s new show consists of her visiting celebrity homes. I swear to Oprah that’s the premise of her new show and I swear to Oprah I’m hyperventilating when I think about it.
“After 25 years I got myself out of the studio chairs. I moved into the next chapter, and I am having more fun than ever – moving around the country and the world talking to people I’m really interested in getting to know and I think viewers will be, too,”
And the even better news is the first episode will air on January 1st on OWN and Oprah will be visiting Steven Tyler’s home.
Here’s hoping she brings that whole thing up.
-Rocco
After These Photos You Can’t Believe Oprah Is Anything But The Queen Of Heaven
Posted on: November 5, 2011
- In: Tidbits
- 8 Comments
Queen of Heaven…. Messiah… the Second Coming…
You can choose your own title for The Oprah and place inappropriate capitalization anywhere you like. She’s amazing and these two photos I’m about to show you will convince you, if you stupidly thought otherwise.
Also, just remember: Oprah is all-knowing (I call her Omniscient Oprah as a pet name), so you really can’t say anything negative about these photos. Not that you would though.
MARTHA STEWART AND OPRAH!! I’m dead. My ghost is typing this.
My dream is to have dinner with those two women (of course cooked by Martha). Such a vision and inspiring photograph. I may frame that.
And get ready for this next photo. Jesus walked on water… Oprah walks on fire!
That’s not the face of someone screaming in pain… that’s the face of someone saying “YEAHHH BITCHES!!!”. What human walks on fire?? (And don’t even say crazy tribe people… just go with my theory that Oprah is excellent and powerful)
Oprah is amazing.
-Rocco
Oprah Looks Like This Now…
Posted on: July 18, 2011
- In: Tidbits
- 5 Comments
And by “this” I mean Goddess-like, omniscient, stunning and wears pink like it’s her job!
Oprah was seen in NYC at a performance of The Book of Mormon and she’s just a vision and a half.
I’m glad Oprah laughs at the Mormons too. It makes her more human.
-Rocco
- In: Tidbits
- 2 Comments
I received this text from a friend tonight and it shook me to my core:
Devy Wevy Bevy: A bus just passed me with the OWN network ad on it and Oprah’s front tooth was blacked out with a marker. Does this mean the apocalypse is coming??
Devy Bevy Wevy knows what’s up.
OOOP! What's gonna happen to planet Earth??
Who would draw on Oprah’s face?? What a jerk!
-Rocco
- In: Tidbits
- 3 Comments
Why isn’t this a national holiday??? This is bullshit! Who do I write to about this??? This is why I forgot.
You forgot my birthday girl?!?!
I’m very neglectful with this whole birthday business this week. Did I miss anyone else??
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALL!
But let’s be real… you’re not as important as Oprah.
I should celebrate January 29th as Christmas. I don’t know why I haven’t. When I have a family, this is going to be the day to celebrate. And instead of a Christmas tree, we will celebrate around a television and watch OWN Network all day. And yes OWN Network will still be on in 5-10 years.
GO SHORTY… IT’S YO BIRTHDAY!!! YOU GONNA PARTY LIKE IT’S YO BIRTHDAY!
This cake is made out of gold. Literally.
I wonder what Oprah does on her birthday??
I get excited when I can convince more than 2 people to come out to dinner for my birthday.
She can get John Travolta, the Obama’s, Celine Dion, and apparently Stevie Wonder, to kick it with her on her birthday.
I want to get invited to that bash… that’s my goal in life.
You're invited!
RSVP??? YES! And I’ll check off for the vegetarian dish.
Just think… this woman has ruled the universe for 57 years. Oh, and I also decided that she is Mother Nature. Like actual Mother Nature. So, next time the weather sucks… you shake your fist at the sky and say “Come on Oprah!!!”
But, don’t be shaking your fists today… it’s Oprah’s birthday.
It’s my sabbath… I’m doing nothing!!
-Rocco
Simon Cowell Is Rocco’s Mentor
Posted on: January 24, 2011
- In: Television
- 7 Comments
I know I always joke about him and how I wish I was his slave intern…. but this is no joke. Every young girl needs a middle-aged British man to look up to, and Simon Cowell is my guy.
Simon Cowell is part of the reason why I studied music in school (him and the Backstreet Boys). I would give up my interview Jamboree with Lee D., and my first born to have 30 minutes with Simon Cowell. (Okay… well I’d give up only one day of the interview Jamboree with Lee D., but I’d still give up my first born).
After watching this, I feel like I’ve wasted 4 years in college. I could have just watched this program and saved a lot of money and time. I’ve learned everything I needed to learn from Simon Cowell.
And so will you.
What I learned… trust your instincts, be patient (we know how good I am at that), have fun, don’t ever be bored, always have an opinion, research kills creativity (couldn’t agree more… why do you think I never fact check???), and learn from others.
Oh and probably the most important thing I’ve learned is get a pet wolf. They kept showing clips of wolves, so I’m assuming this is pretty important.
This is super excellent. I really heart him.
He’s so wise.
Oh and that reminds me…. at the end of the 4th part there is a little clip of Lee D. winning Idol. Just for those of you who only come here for Lee D. goodness… there ya go 
I’m gonna go let this knowledge sink in.
-Rocco
What’s The Most Important Thing On This List Of Things Happening Today??
Posted on: January 23, 2011
- In: Television
- 5 Comments
1) Crystal Bowersox??? Who cares. Nashville? No thanks. Is Megan McCormick the girl who sqacked like a bird on Idol?? That girls name was definitely Megan.
2) Lee D.??? Kind of exciting (okay exciting)… but there is nothing I can really do about watching this in real time and something else is trumping this.
3) Blake Lewis?? Not even close
4) SIMON COWELL & OPRAH??? DING!! DING!! DING!!
Can’t even tell you how much joy is brought into my life by looking at this picture. Oprah’s giving Simon a motherly “come here I love you” hug and Simon is eating it up. He loves it.
I wanna be squished in the middle of those two so badly. Maybe there awesome-ness will get on me through osmosis.
Anyway, Simon Cowell is going to be on Oprah Presents: Master Class, and basically it’s just a biography about cool people. Here is the description from her website:
The biography series shares hard-won insight from extraordinary achievers whose paths have inspired Oprah—and countless others.
My goal in life is to be on that show!! I need to be! That’s how I’ll know if I made it.
I want to inspire Oprah… you have to be quite the inspirer for Oprah to be like “oh yo… that person makes me want to do something with my life”.
She is the most powerful person ever, so that’s a pretty big feat.
I can’t wait to see this… I hope I can find some clips tomorrow.
Let’s look at another picture:
Simon: You're great. / Oprah: No, you're great!
-Rocco
- In: Television
- 2 Comments
Oprah is revealing a big family secret this Monday on her show and it’s going to be the SHIIIIIT!
I HAVE A SEEEECCRREEEEETTT!!!! YAAAAAAAH!!
“I was given some news that literally shook me to my core. This time, I’m the one being reunited. I was keeping a family secret for months, and on Monday you’re going to hear it straight from me,”
Girl knows how to get ratings. I’ve never wanted to see a show more. Normally, I would be planning how to fake my own death to get out of work, and then selling my organs on the black market to buy a television and get cable by Monday @ 4PM.
But, luckily, I already know the secret.
Are you ready for this???
WE SHARE DNA!!
I know, I know… you’re saying “Rocco…. surely you don’t share DNA… you’re white and she is black”. And to that I say “have you seen my hair???”
We’re going to get our blood work done by Dr. Oz to prove all this. And then we will have counseling to deal with all this with Dr. Phil. PERFECT!
It will be a show on her OWN Network….Oprah & Rocco: The Messiah & Her Prophet.
WATCH OUR SHOOOOOOOW!!
I don’t even need Simon Cowell to give me a job anymore…. I’m good with this.
Oprah will have to pay me to shut my mouth… because if not, I’m gonna tell all of her, Gayle, and Stedman’s secrets.
I’m not above bribes… we know that.
Right Lee bear?? WHERE THE HAT!
How's this hat Rocco??
It works for you Oprah… but not Lee bear.
-Rocco
Kris With A K & Zorro With A Z
Posted on: January 10, 2011
- In: Tidbits
- 3 Comments
Kris with a K has a puppy. The puppy’s name is Zorro. And from here on out he will be called Zorro with a Z.
With all this snow hitting the US, because Oprah is just trying to snow us all in so we can watch the OWN Network, Kris with a K found something to do with his time off.
The real life dog is freakin’ adorable and I’m instantly angry that my parents didn’t get me a dog this year for Christmas, and the snow dog is freakin’ frightening.
I know it’s snow… but I can just imagine it coming alive and biting my ankles.
Zorro with a Z is adorable… he might be the cutest thing I’ve seen all day. I’d like to thank ItsMyT1me for showing me this adorable picture. You win the award for showing me the cutest thing all day… and probably for the rest of the week. Unless, Zorro with a Z has another picture. Then he’ll be in competition with himself. FAKE COMPETITION!
-Rocco
