Posts Tagged ‘People Magazine’
Even Channing Tatum looks a little glum over this title. He just knows that the Ryan Gosling fans are going to lose their minds over this. Like, properly lose their minds over this. Do we all remember last year?
Anyway, let’s all agree that the people at People Magazine watched Step Up, The Vow, and Dear John before coming to this conclusion. His” heart of gold male stripper” character has NOTHING to do with it.
But seriously— I’m more concerned about the J Biebs and Selena Gomez break-up… they just look so happy in that little photo *tear*.
-Rocco
Who would lie to People Magazine?
“I am retired as an actor. I am moving to New York to launch my career. I am going to do a fashion line,” Amanda told People in an upbeat phone conversation. “I am not talking about being arrested for DUI because I don’t drink, and I don’t drink and drive. It is all false.”
There you have it. She’s cool. All is well.
-Rocco
-Rocco
Paula Deen Looks Like This Now…
Posted on: June 28, 2012
I think she got a weave too.
-Rocco
Not Shocking News Of The Day: Jessica Simpson Is Weight Watcher’s New Spokeswoman
Posted on: May 31, 2012
This obvious news was announced the same day Jessica Simpson unveiled baby Maxwell to the world.
What a little chunky monkey! <—I’m talking about the baby, but Weight Watchers obviously said that about Jessica Simpson when they gave her a crap ton of money to lose weight.
How do I get signed up for something like this? I’ll gladly eat a lot of food, gain 100 lbs and then get paid millions to lose it. SIGN ME UP!
“The cool thing about the program is that it focuses on healthy habits for the long-term (and I can still indulge in my guilty pleasures every now and then too),” the 31-year-old entertainer wrote on her Facebook page the same day herPeople cover – with baby Maxwell – debuted.
“I have actually gotten a group of friends together who are going to be doing it with me,” Jess added. “You can join me too and we can share our experiences!”
I’m going to do this alongside Jessica Simpson and hopefully the only experience she shares with me is that she gives me half her money.
-Rocco
Swaggie pose on the cover of Rolling Stone.
Beyonce just got de-throwned for best magazine cover this week… an award I never give out.
Rock star.
-Rocco
- In: Tidbits
- 10 Comments
Okay…. this is really just a ploy for you all to tell me how beautiful I am. And to also blow up people’s spots because I have received the most hilarious comments. Ever.
Listen. I get it. I can’t write a blog as perfect as Beyonce writes songs, (and side note… I probably can’t produce a baby as beautiful as Beyonce can) but the important thing is I try. And my Mom and Dad think I’m funny, and isn’t that what we all strive for in life? (And to marry a One Direction member??)
Comments from a not so “well wisher”. Such an ironic name after you read the comments:
How do they know where Suri Cruise was sticking her tongue?? Her eye line was clearly on Katie Holmes. It was so obvious. Plus, I don’t lie about Suri Cruise… she could have me killed.
I do have a problem with Tom Cruises’ height. Those Mission Impossible movies will be a little bit more believable if he was at least 5’10″. Dark people?? Who says that? This is 2012, not 1950 and on the movie set of The Help. And I voted Barack Obama so, cool it with calling me a racist, homeslice.
Grim Reaper? How 17th century of you! But I think I won this battle with my awesome Clueless quote. So in yo face!
The point of this was to blow up this person’s spot, say congrats to Beyonce, and to sign some of you up to start my campaign for next year’s Most Beautiful Woman/Blogger.
PS If I’m dead by the end of the week… either the Grim Reaper is a massive fan of The Revolution and read these comments or “well wisher” and “not reaper” killed me. Their ip addresses are in my email, so you can find them.
-Rocco
Katy Perry’s Parents Still Love Her Even Though She’s A Sinner With Boobs
Posted on: January 7, 2012
I’m pretty sure that’s what they mean by commenting on her divorce to all of a sudden attractive, Russell Brand. (There’s something about a divorced man)
First, What’s with these family members just speaking out?? I’m glad my family is never the “exclusive source”. And yes, US Weekly and InTouch calls my parents all the time to get the scoop on me.
Second, This is what Keith and Mary Hudson had to say, IN THEIR CHURCH, about their daughter, who they still totally love:
“I love my daughter and I will always love her,” Katy’s dad said, according to the NY Post. “Stop being judgmental and critical. Do not close the doors to your loved ones, especially your children.”
“What has taken place in my daughter’s life has opened many opportunities to go in and be with guarded and gated people,” Keith added. “God has given us a platform to go in and meet people – and they like us because we are cool. We are not threatening.”
Cool and not threatening?? You didn’t let your kids eat Lucky Charms!!
And I’m pretty sure the platform they are talking about are Katy’s boobs and her songs about being a lesbian while drunk. True stuff.
-Rocco
- In: magazines
- 6 Comments
Listen. I was never team Jacob Black/Taylor Lautner because the pale (or sparkly) stalker type is more my speed, but I get why people are into Taylor Lautner. He could kill someone with his bad acting and abs… it’s a attractive for some people.
Suck it, Jacob!
Anyway, you ladies will be able to calm yourselves because Taylor Lautner is not gay. Someone has no friends or family to hang out with during the holiday weekend so they sat in their house, drinking a cheap bottle of rose, and photoshopped a magazine cover. It’s quite adorable actually.
A gay man would never use that image to come out of the closet… just ask Lance Bass’ magazine cover.
Taylor Lautner still wants to be an action hero and sleep with woman as far as I know, so all the 13 year olds can still make out with that Jacob Black pillowcase.
-Rocco
PS One more jawline for the road.
We all remember the backlash poor, pretty Bradley Cooper faced when he was honored with the Sexiest Man Alive award.
Ryan Gosling fans lost their goddamn minds and made Bradley Cooper feel ugly. Probably.
But B Coop is smart and thinks Ryan Gosling is attractive too.
I'm hot, but so is R. Gos
“There was such a backlash to when they announced it and Ryan Gosling, who I love…[but] a friend of mine showed me photographs from the paparazzi — And it’s like him walking around and he literally looks like he’s in a photoshoot.”
Now, I will show you pictures of Ryan Gosling so we can all concur with B Coop’s intelligence.
I guess?
-Rocco
- In: Glee
- 2 Comments
Like every other female in the Western world (minus the people who have nothing better to do that to protest the fact that they think Ryan Gosling was salted out of the honor), I went out and bought a copy of People Magazine’s Sexiest Man Alive issue, and as I perused it, I came across this:
And instantly I thought, who is this man with the furrowed brow and why do I love him??
It was Darren Criss and I swear on the bag of Goldfish I just consumed that I had a dream that night that Darren Criss was my high school boyfriend. They only things missing in the dream was us breaking out in pop songs… other than that, it was superb.
Anyway, I can’t wait to watch Glee on Tuesday to keep my torch burning.
And luckily, there are screen shots of him shirtless. I mean, if you’re into that kind of thing.
-Rocco
