Rocco's Pop Revolution: Seen through the eyes of someone living it

Posts Tagged ‘Take Me Home

I can not get enough of those goat remixes.  They are the funniest things I’ve ever seen. So entertaining.

So of course after I listen and go on a giggle marathon for 15 minutes over a 30 second clip (just writing it is making me laugh) I proceeded to google “One Direction Goats”.

Priceless gems came up in the results.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MyKVaxRuQBs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsGT0LYj4jk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-lgM-WQZsPs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Llu665oMFZQ

I don’t know why those shits are embedding, but I urge you to click those links and listen.

Those goats need to form a boy band.

And to spice this post up…..

imagesOscar’s new BFF.

-Rocco

I don’t know what happened when they landed in Tokyo, but they got some Asian makeovers on the black market or something.

I love them but 2/5ths of them (my favorite 2/5ths) went to a Japanese salon and got their shit  messed up.

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Liam– still precious. Boring as all hell but precious.

Louis– still a little questionable (sexual wise), but I like appreciate the Footloose acid washed jacket.

Zayn–I’m going to go with jet lag. I don’t know what happened to the quiff, but did Simon Cowell approve this new hairdo he’s trying? He looks like he’s about one bout with “guy liner” before turning into Jared Leto (before Jared Leto shaved his eyebrows to play a woman or whatever the hell he’s doing).

Niall– I can’t see his teeth but I pray they weren’t removed while in Tokyo because if that happened he probably has no teeth.

Harry– Minus the cross that’s beaming off his chest (I always pretended he was Jewish for some reason even though I had no basis in my theory whatsoever), I can’t help but notice him and I have the same sweater and same lip gloss. He looks like a woman. I think it’s the hair. He may or may not have curlers in his hair (Shout out to B Coop!!)

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Come back to America— at the very least, go back to London and stop trying to be fashion forward with Tokyo.

-Rocco

 

“Induce hysteria in a tween girl”? Bitch please, Barbara— I’m an adult and I know all their first and last names, some birthdays, some ages, and I’d date no less than 4/5 of them.

That was great.

And let me just remind you that Barbara Walters said “I’m going to kill myself” when Harry basically said she was too old for him. CALM DOWN BABS!

I don’t now who else was on this “most fascinating” list, and I’m sure I’d agree with Babs (because she’s like the older, whiter version of Oprah), but no one fascinates me more than these dudes.

-Rocco

I’m really trying to deal with this in the most mature way possible, and the only way to do that is to post one grainy picture of this new celeb couple and repeat to myself that I’m an adult in the real world and I don’t care if the love of my life is dating the pop star who gives me love advice via her pop songs. Was that too dramatic?

No, that’s logical right?

taylor-swift-harry-styles-holding-hands-after-1d-concert-03

I just cried and ate a Kit-Kat because of that photo.

I may have lost Harry Styles, and while I have Zayn (Vas Happening??!– Haha get it One Direction fans??), I also have Twitter. And Twitter gets me.

Screen shot 2012-12-05 at 7.43.21 AM

See?

I’ll be okay guys. I’m just telling myself all the awesome songs that are going to come from this fling.

And let’s also just give Taylor some props for doing the walk of shame like a proud contemporary woman! Go get it, girl! True, it looks like she’s helping him cross the street but the important thing is they are crossing the street to go have a sleepover.

But seriously— I don’t want to talk about this anymore.

-Rocco

Whoooooa. Keep your pants on Queen Elizabeth.

This woman has been alive for about 175 years and smiled maybe 17 times, but never has a smile been this big.

 

 

 

I know you can only see her profile but woman is grinning from ear to ear!

I’m super jealous.

This is like Thanksgiving torture. I don’t know what that means, but I now know the feeling.

-Rocco

I’m 25 . Could you just imagine if I was a 15 year old girl? One Direction would have sent me into a mental institution. I’m glad I’m an “adult” and have a semi-logical and rational  reaction to One Direction about 77% of the time.

One Direction are on the cover of the December issue of Teen Vogue and there is a group shot (I presume) and solo covers. I NEED THEM ALL! Is this how people who collect Pokémon cards feel? It’s stressful!

Let’s see what we got:

Niall– he looks like a Sears catalog model, but when his braces are photoshopped out he wins. Those highlights just really frame his face.

 

Louis– he looks straight for one of the few times in his life. This is a win for me.

 

 

Liam– single-hood is really becoming on him…. and so is the hint of that face foliage. I also like his coyness in hiding his neck mole. Hot.

 

 

Zayn— this kid pouts and broods like a mofo. And he wears grandpa sweaters and pants like a mofo. It looks great on him, but it will look even better folded neatly on my bed. Wait, what?? I apologize, but I’m not deleting anything.

 

Harry– he is out of control cute. The hair, the eyes, the slight lip bite. LIKE COME ON DUDE! Girls will become women after looking at this.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Take Me Home comes out next Tuesday.

-Rocco

I just can’t with these guys.

They are way too freakin’ adorable for anyone to deal with. And now they are like a real cohesive group and sound great together and are actually talented. Not that they weren’t talented before, but with puberty came deeper voices and tones and it has just made them better. (Oh and hints of facial hair came with that too, so it just ups their appeal).

One Direction performed on X Factor last night so that means no one gives two shits about who went home (But seriously– who got kicked off? Was it the girl group with 19 names?) because all anyone cared about was these 5 boys.

They started the night with some annoying voiceover man creaming about them singing “Live While We’re Young” and then the fun started. God, even their stage production is adorable.

I love when they sing about one night stands— I just really love it.

AND THEN– full séance happened. The lights came down, candles came out, and I assume Quija boards were whipped out.

 

Niall is clearly doing some sort of Irish voodoo on us all and it has something to do with making us all fall in love with him.

Beautiful song.

I just want to prepare you all for multiple One Direction posts (like a lot of them) because the album comes out next week and I will be googling a lot.

-Rocco

Listen. I’m not into leaked albums. It upsets me. Artists work hard on their music and release it on a specific date for a reason (to capitalize and make money off that shit) but if someone hands me leaked One Direction tracks— I GOTTA LISTEN!

This new album, Take Me Home, was make it or break it for me. I couldn’t continue to semi-inappropriately love Harry Styles if his music was crap, ya know? I have too much self-respect for that.

Luckily, from what I heard, One Direction and Simon Cowell built a time machine and the fellas went back to 1999 and recorded Take Me Home. That’s how beautiful this pop music is.

Let’s listen to a few shall we:

“They Don’t Know About Us”- I’m convinced there is a demo floating around of the Backstreet Boys singing this and/or the Backstreet Boys and One Direction competed in a boy band obstacle course to win this track. And yes, it’s that good.

“Rock Me”

Do I remember “summer ‘o9″? Yes. Yes, I do Harry. YOU WERE 15!!! But this song is so good I just over look that age issue once again. “Hit the pedal, heavy metal, show me you care”— why don’t boys say that in real life?

“Kiss You”

I can’t with this song. It’s too poptastic— my heart explodes. The repetition and the lyrical content makes me heart go boom. I believe one of the lines “I just wanna show you off to all my friends– making them drool down their chinny chin chins”. Chinny chin chins? Whoever wrote and/or sang that line is my best friend.

Oh god— I forgot about the “na na na” breakdown. This is what love feels like.

Now, don’t illegally download these gems…. go get Take Me Home on November 13.

-Rocco

I only want to see One Direction in black and white for the rest of my life, and the “Little Things” music video is exactly why.

1) Zayn— if it’s possible he got hotter and is done with puberty. I don’t even know guys my age that grow scruff that hot. Never ever shave.

2) Liam— his neck mole/beauty mark is back and glowing. It’s the star of this music video.

3) Louis— I’m glad they gave him a verse. Dude never gets to sing, but he got a new haircut and can pretend play the guitar really well, so they gave him a shot.

4) Harry— I can’t even. I pretend he’s singing to me. I think if I was drunk at 8AM watching this music video, I’d be in tears the moment he opened his mouth.

5) Niall— I believe Niall when he plucks that guitar. And he’s going to torpedo through women once he gets his braces off.

 

I mean, I think I proved my point.

Take Me Home comes out next Tuesday, November 13.

-Rocco

The One Direction boys are gearing up to release their sophomore album, Take Me Home, on November 13th and with that comes a video for their second single “Little Things” which comes out tomorrow.

I love this song. It’s written by Ed Sheeran so it just fills your heart up with warmth.

And then add these 5 gems and it’s like eating cupcakes with glitter sprinkles at every meal and never gaining a pound; PURE HEAVEN!

Below is a teaser/countdown to the release of the new video featuring Harry Styles and he’s just such a little cupcake himself.

Side note: I ALMOST went out for Halloween last night and I was going to be a “Directioner”. My costume was almost complete with my One Direction shirt, unbrushed hair, and glitter nail polish, but I couldn’t find me retainer so the costume was ruined.

-Rocco


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