Posts Tagged ‘Teenage Dream’
God… I know this video came out days ago, but The Revolution hiatus yesterday threw me off.
“The One That Got Away” is about an old Katy Perry unhappily married to what I assume is an old Russell Brand, but wishing she was married to whoever her old boyfriend was. Old Katy Perry looks like Barbara Bush.
She ruined his painting. I’d break up with the bitch too, but then try not to drive my car off a cliff because then you can’t have a sordid affair later on in life. Unless his ghost is into that kind of thing.
We are all on the same page about that right?? The hatred Katy Perry’s parents feel for their daughter in unreal and her new Rolling Stone cover just adds fuel to the fire.
First off, no set of parents who pray and clutch the bible as they sleep are into the Hershey Kiss bra.
Second, Katy Perry believes in aliens (and not the Mexican kind) and she is a total democrat who wants free health care. Her parents are currently trying to douse her with holy water before their heads explode.
Katy Perry loves the History Channel’s Ancient Aliens:
“Oh my God,” she says. “When it talks about the sky people, how everyone comes from the sky and how the Pyramids were used for star observations, it’s too much for me. It all seems to connect the dots. It’s blowing my mind.”
And she’s such a democrat:
“It just feels like the thing running our country is a bank, money,” she says. “I know it sounds like an intense viewpoint, but I’m only slowly but surely getting the wool taken off my eyes. When I was a kid, I asked questions about my faith. Now I’m asking questions about the world.”
She continues: “I think we are largely in desperate need of revolutionary change in the way our mindset is. Our priority is fame, and people’s wellness is way low. I saw this knowing full well that I’m a part of the problem. I’m playing the game, though I am trying to reroute. Anyway, not to get all politically divulging and introspective, but the fact that America doesn’t have free health care drives me fucking absolutely crazy, and is so wrong.“
Russell Brand is like Satan and has taken this Evangelical Christian from the church and has turned her into something her parents would normally burn at the stake.
Nice job Russell. I like you more.
Someone check on Mr. & Mrs. Perry and make sure they haven’t killed themselves.
I just told you all way to much information…. but oh well. It’s not secret I didn’t brush my hair, and I still don’t. Really.
I kinda sorta looked like that. Minus the braces face attachment to my face. I was a little bit cooler than that.
And I definitely didn’t have a major wedgie in my denim overalls.
I can’t wait 9 months for one and plus, then they have to learn to talk and walk. I don’t have time for that. I need it now!
Can I borrow anyone’s child?? He has to be as cute, if not cuter, than this child. (And he has to come with his own piped blazer… I’m not made of money. I will feed him peanut butter & jelly though)
He’s 36 and I really don’t care either way that it’s his birthday… I just wanted to show you this picture that I saw because I hope and pray that Katy Perry’s parents read The Revolution and see it as well.
What a teenage dream.
I hope they print this picture and use it as a book mark…. for their bible.
Let me warn you: These pictures are from the set of Rock Of Ages.
I didn’t know that when I saw them and I was harshly judging the outfit and the hair and why Katy Perry wasn’t handing him divorce papers in these photos. But maybe I’m just quick to divorce.
I think that may be his actual hair though. So, lets get those divorce paper’s pending.
I’m still mad at Katy Perry for her tour rider business, so every song from here on out will annoy me.
And “Last Friday Night” is no exception.
I do respect the art of the brace face though. I admire the respect people have for straight teeth.
Oh and look I even provided you with song lyrics in case you are dying to know the words. You’re welcome.
Just don’t look at me through the rear view mirror.
No wonder Lee DeWyze decided he liked Lady Gaga better than Katy Perry. He just feels sorry for Lady Gaga’s insanity and doesn’t feel sorry for the fact that Katy Perry is a giant bitch. <— you can quote him on that. I’m like 78% confident he feels that way.
Katy Perry’s tour rider (demands that are unnecessary) was leaked and she needs to relax. Reading this actually made me want to punch her in the face and both boobs. Here are some of the ridiculous requests that make her look like a stuck up jerk:
1)NO CARNATIONS!! (I don’t know what her beef is with carnations but she hates them. Maybe they kill her?? Or make her realize her that blue wig looks demented???)
2) Baby wipes. Huggies, of course (Will.I.Am. will be proud)
3) A jar of quality honey
4) a ridiculous amount of furniture all in cream
5) 2 French ornate styled floor lamps
And my absolute favorite are the demands she has for her driver…..
1) no opening doors
2) no touching bags
3) no staring at the backseat through the rear view mirror (<– I’m pretty sure that’s called driving, watching the road and changing lanes. But go ahead and get in a car accident. At least than we don’t have to pay attention to this tour rider)
4) no talking to Katy Perry or her fans (I really want to speak to this driver)
5) no driving anywhere besides the left lane (I hope her driver isn’t taking her up to the rapture because he’s gonna have to leave the left lane for that)
6) drivers window must be 1/2 way down at pick up and drop off
7) The driver will never assume
And there are about 10 more requests that are just as dumb. You can read the whole tour rider HERE at the Smoking Gun.
She does know she looks like a complete asshole right??? I guess that’s the result of strict, Christian upbringing. They should have just let her listen to the damn Michael Jackson album and vacuum with the Dirt Devil.
If Lee D. does not cover “Judas” or “Bad Romance”, “Poker Face” or I’m sure his personal favorite, the one about the disco stick, on his stop in NYC in June I’m just gonna start my own Lady Gaga cover concert in the back. I hope you all will join me.
I wake up this AM and see this on Twitter so I immediately click the link, because I’m a curious cat, and then I see him posing like he’s in a JC Penny catalogue.
Anyway, it’s a great little interview. You can read it HERE and I will just bastardize it below. Cool? Awesome!
Q: Do you find yourself wishing that you had judges like the Jennifer Lopez and Steven Tyler?
LD: Well I won, so not really. I mean it worked out well for me in my season, but, I think they’re cool, and would be great to have as judges, but, I was fine with mine.
I love this. I read this as “Umm no you moron. Why would I change my judges?? They loved me. I don’t want to hear what Steven Tyler things of me when he’s coming down from an Acid trip and I certainly don’t want to know what J Lo thinks of herself”.
Q: Do you think the new judges make it easier?
LD: I’m sure the contestants don’t think so, you know. They’ll deal with it the same way we all dealt with it. But I mean, I definitely think that the show is a little more encouraging this year than past seasons, I think the judges are… it’s very positive this year, which isn’t a bad thing, you know, being positive is never a bad thing, but, I think people, viewers like the drama, they want to see people get torn down… they want to turn it on, see people, you know… they want to see the Simon Cowell saying “You’re the worst”, that’s why people watch, you know, so, but, I think they’ve come down to the final three and they’re all really talented, and anyone of them can win, so I think that the show’s been great this year.
It’s like Lee really knows me. That’s EXACTLY why I watch this show. Why do you think my favorite part of the season was when they decided to tell Haley she sucked?? Because I like to see the contestants give the bitch face. I didn’t see the bitch face once from Lee and my one goal in life is to have him look at me that way. And then we will laugh and *high five*.
Q: Do you have a favourite?
LD: No, not really. I think that they’re all pretty talented and I think that they all going to do something in music, one way or another, whether they win or not, so, I’m just defending music and I’m a fan of all three of them.
Lee should have just said Haley because now he has the wrath of Haley coming after him.
Q: How do cope with comparisons to previous winners and does it get intimidating at times?
LD: No, and I think that the only people that make those comparisons are people that don’t really listen to the music and are just fans of the show. I mean, its one thing to sit there and watch ‘American Idol’ and write about it, but it’s another thing if you like music, and you listen to it, because if you listen to the music, there is absolutely no way in a million years you can compare any of the artist to each other. But, lots of time people don’t do that, and they just watch the show and they say “hey, that guy’s got brown hair, that guy’s got brown hair, they’re the same person!” I mean its ignorance really, for people to write that kind of stuff. It doesn’t bother me at all. It’s not intimidating because I’m me, so, what Carrie Underwood does, what David Cook does, or Chris Allen does, I mean the list goes on, Kelly Clarkson does, what Taylor Hicks does. My career is my career and my music is my music, so, the common, you know, bond, between all of us is that we’re all on ‘American Idol’, we can all share in that experience. But the show is supposed to be made so once you are off of it, you can go do what you want and make the music you want to make. And it’s almost as if sometimes people love you on the show and then when you’re done they just want to get to the next season and watch the next contestants, so, you’re either a fan of ‘American Idol’ and music, or you’re a fan of ‘American Idol’. There’s two different kinds of situation there, so, but for me, it’s not intimidating at all, I love the fans, and, I think they’re great, and if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t be where I’m at, so, I mean, the success of other people coming from the show, really doesn’t mean anything to me at all.
Okay. I admit I didn’t read that answer thoroughly because its way too long (I did really awesome during the reading comprehension portion of the SAT’s don’t you worry!) but I just want to state, like I’ve done before, that I hate the “white guys with guitars” thing. And I may have called Lee D., a bear, a non-gay Gap model, and the most fun person on the planet , but I never called him WGWG. I’m not that cold hearted.
And as for his comment about the brown hair….. Lee, who really has the best head of brown hair?? I rest my case.
And then he pretty much just goes on to say how he misses friends and family, no regrets, loves writing music, hates the song “Earth Stood Stil” blah blah blah and then the mother of all questions is asked! And this photo makes so much sense now.
Q: Lady Gaga or Katy Perry, Why?
LD: That’s a really hard question… Lady Gaga… If I had to pick.
LADY GAGA?!?!? I mean Katy Perry isn’t Abe Lincoln or anything, but that’s like picking Ronald Reagan as your favorite President (I have no idea what that means… that was an awful comparison, but just go with it.)
And plus, answer the entire question dude! He didn’t say why he chose Lady Gaga. I’m gonna keep asking him that over and over if I ever meet him.
Rocco: Why did you choose Gaga over Katy Perry?
Lee D: What?
Rocco: Why? Is it because Katy Perry’s parents are bat shit crazy???
Lee D: Ummmm… do you want a picture or something??
Lee D: Security!
Linc the Sink: Yes???
Lee D: She won’t stop asking me about Lady Gaga.
*and then me and Linc the Sink fall in love and ride off into the sunset wearing the hat of all freakin’ hats*
(This all went on for way to long. Sorry)
Ohhh see how I switched that up?? Hey, it’s Friday and I can do whatever the f**k I want. Casual Friday baby!!!
Katy Perry’s new single is actually called “Last Friday Night (TGIF)” so that was a perfect segway. You’re welcome.
1) She looks like this is the video.
2) I really hope this video takes place in the chain restaurant Friday’s. They have excellent guacamole.